Hi yalls! Sorry I haven’t been active at all! I have received my diagnosis of bipolar in addition to all the rest of my baggage. I got taken off on of my medications, Lamotrigine. It caused agitation and aggression as well as many severe physical side effects (none of the red flag lethal ones though yay). Being taken off that and not being put on anything immediately afterwards seems like a major mistake. It caused a MAJOR depressive low, worse impulsiveness, even more uncontrollable unaware mood swings and emotions. It ended with me heading to the hospital as I was a hair away from doing something that others would probably mourn over due to finally snapping over an abandonment panic attack. I was put into inpatient care for a week and a half. If I had been put on a medication for depression AT LEAST or mood stabilizer it would not have gotten to that point. Unfortunately I had neither the time or money to create an additional appointment on a friday evening, so I had to wait for the that thursday when my appointment was.
The silver lining though is that I got off the Lamotrigine, which I have nicknamed the murder drug as there are anger impulsive murders connected to it. YAY!!!!
I was told many horror stories about staying in the psych ward. Luckily I was put into the high functioning adults unit, so we were allowed more freedom and the environment was much more friendly and relaxed. The nurses all tried their hardest to make us comfortable and were always willing to lend an ear (this is special to our unit I heard). I made friendships with people who were suffering like I was. I was able to self reflect, better myself, and study myself on a whole new level without outside/reality distractions. Overall, it was an amazing experience for me, as it was therapy not 4 hours a week, but 24/7. I learned a lot, good and bad, and came up with ways I can improve on and fix myself.